If you fear rejection—in your telephone conversations, or when you ask a prospect to engage your services—you’ll definitely want to spend just 24 minutes viewing the TedX Talk given by by Chinese-American entrepreneur Jia Jang.
Jang talks about the fear of rejection that almost caused him to give up his dream of creating his own company. He mentions going online to a site where he learned about “Rejection Therapy”.
When I saw his earlier talk at the World Domination Summit in 2013, I was intrigued. I had given countless workshops wherein I challenged participants to purposely ask for things that they were previously sure would be denied to them, but I had not yet heard what I was teaching being called “Rejection Therapy”.
After one of my Manhattan workshops, two of the attendees who had flown in from the Midwest went to a bar together and asked the bartender for free drinks, expecting a “no” response. They told the bartender that this was their first time in New York and that they wanted to make sure the drinks were good.
To their surprise, the bartender gave them the drinks they requested, making it clear that he would allow them just one extra drink each.
When they excitedly shared their adventure with our group the next day, the point was clear:
Ask. You may just get what you ask for.
While Jang now owns the web site rejectiontherapy.com, Jason Comely, the Canadian founder of the site created the 100-day “No Game” that Jang was talks about. It’s a real life game with only one rule:
YOU MUST BE REJECTED BY ANOTHER PERSON AT LEAST ONCE, EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR 100 DAYS.
“Please notice the wording of the rule,” Comely told Jang. “It doesn’t say you must attempt or try to be rejected. The rule is you MUST be rejected by another human being. In this game, rejection is success. No other outcome will meet the requirement of Rejection Therapy.”
You can play the game on your own, and Jang has converted Comely’s game cards into pdfs for which he still charges only $10 (not required).
In his 2013 talk which is no longer available, Jang told us that in “playing” Rejection Therapy, he asked a police officer if he could drive the police car and a pilot if he could fly his small plane. To his surprise, both let him do it—just because he asked. In fact, in my workshops, many of the outlandish requests made by my attendees are granted. Some have told me they found it difficult to actually be rejected.
If you often don’t ask for appointments or referrals, or a sale, or–as in Jang’s case–investments because you’re afraid of being rejected, spend 100 days playing The NO Game. You’ll learn the lesson that Jang did: that it’s OK if someone says “NO”. It’s just information about that person’s state of mind, not rejection.
Contact me today for help, and if I can, give me an opportunity to surprise you with a “YES”. Either way, keep REACHING…
