In my book, The High Diving Board, I discuss Seven Paralyzing Fears, including the Fear of Rejection.
Fear of rejection—of having someone say “no”—stops people from asking for help, support, money, a date, a job, a referral, or a sale. Victims suffer what I call “Fear Factor” symptoms, including these:
They become tongue-tied…Their paralysis makes it impossible for them to pick up the phone…They’ll actually avoid the person they want to ask for help, going as far as walking across the room, or leaving it altogether…They break out in a sweat at the mere thought of asking for what they want.
But while the Fear of Rejection is very real, it is extremely rare that asking for something actually results in rejection. If you ask someone to refer you to a business acquaintance, and he or she says “no”, you could tell yourself that you have been rejected…but in reality, nothing has changed.
Did you have a connection to the person you wanted to contact before you asked? No!
Did you have a connection to that person after you asked? No!
Did your business—or life—get worse? No. It stayed the same!
Next time you’re paralyzed by the Fear of Rejection, ask yourself this question:
“If the person I ask says ‘no’, am I really in any different position than I was in before?”
If the answer you give yourself is “No, my position would be unchanged,” remember to ask for what you want.
In the meantime, keep REACHING…
*Image courtesy of Buzzle.com.